BrutalRoast
The landing page audit ChatGPT can't run
BrutalRoast launched on June 2, 2026 with 4 votes, #3,322 of 22,647 launches that month and more than 75% of that year's launches.
What it does
Landing page audits that read your text and guess your speed. I built the opposite. BrutalRoast loads your live page in a real browser. Playwright. Lighthouse. axe-core. Vision AI on real screenshots — desktop, tablet, mobile. Benchmark vs SaaS medians. It tells you your LCP is 4.2s. It names the contrast that's failing. It sees what your mobile actually looks like. ChatGPT can't do any of that. Free score. Full audit $9. Founding 50: Pro for 1 year at $49 — 50 spots.
We load your live page in a real browser and measure what's broken: speed, accessibility, SEO, mobile render. Free score, $9 full audit.
🔥 Founding 50: get Pro for a full year — $49 instead of $588. First 50 founders only. We'll prove it with data, not opinions. Free score. $9 to fix it. Not ready to paste yours? See a real, fully-unlocked sample roast → Real speed, accessibility, SEO, mobile render + every fix. $9 one-time. A chat model reads the text you paste. We load your live page in a real browser and run the same tools a senior audit would. LCP, CLS, blocking time and your actual page weight, measured by Google, not estimated. The exact contrast failures, missing alt text and unlabeled inputs on your rendered page. Title, meta, single H1, Open Graph, schema, canonical, robots and sitemap. Pass or fail. We screenshot…from brutalroast.io
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